Tears in my Beer

Or maybe the tears were on the floor, either way I was at a tavern with my old boss Shawn, telling him how aweful things have been at work since he left. I hung my head down and cried and the tears hit the floor. Shawn said he felt bad and then walked away.

This Past Weekend, Scariest of Scary

Saturday night or actually Sunday morning I awoke at 4:20 am or thereabouts. I was having anxiety attacks from not having to have taken my medication so I took it.
I went back to sleep only to feel like I was in the worst nightmare ever, except I did not wake up feeling cold and lifeless, I almost feel like I conquered the worst nightmare I've ever had.
It was surreal. I was in a little town, in a gas station or something. It was old and decrepit and seemed it was run by nepotist townies. They weren't just any old mean townies, they were like the family from the Texas Chainsaw Masacre II. It was only a matter of time and they were going to do things to me and perhaps eat me for dinner. I was acting as casual as I could, even sitting in the backseat of a car smoking a cigarette, seeming very relaxed. A man got into the back seat with me and I asked him if maybe he'd want to get married, then I could be part of the creepy family and they wouldn't kill maim or eat me. Then I realized this guy was in the same boat as I was, he wasn't creepy, he wasn't one of them. I tried to telepathically tell this guy that we could hop in the front seat, lock the doors and hope the car would zoom out of there with us in it. Then they all started to disassemble the car from the outside and I woke up.
The next day was a gloomy Sunday. I realized some of my dream was from watching a TruTV case about a deaf girl who was dismembered. Later in the evening after the dream I watched Nancy Grace where they found the torso of a woman outside of her apartment recently. Amy Winehouse died. All creepy gloomy news. I am going to watch nothing but upbeat shows and comedies for a while.

The Rock Star and the Envelopes

The night before I went to see M. Doughty in Newburyport MA I dreamed he was inviting me into a building, watching me, observing me, he liked me.
Suddenly I was in a room with a man behind a series of tables. A few of us were on the other side of that table. I sensed he wanted us to stuff envelopes.

I think that meant to write letters, lots of letters.

The Sales Agent, the Medaglias

I remember sitting outdoors and glancing into a Salesman's laptop, he was trying to sell me something. He never set out to sell me Real Estate, that I know, yet on the slides were maps of places for sale and one caught my eye. It was Florida Massachusetts. Yes there is a town called Florida in Massachusetts. It was a topical map, the kind where circular lines, and the lines were outlining an island. I kept thinking how my husband would love it there--he could fish and I could hike. Suddenly I remembered another dream where I hiked out of this same place, I had to hike for a long long time but it was worth it because it was beautiful and peaceful.
I neglected as of yet to tell you the Salesman was a very good looking man. He looked like a TV movie actor, I guess I'd have to google him to find his name, but he leaned toward me, and I'm not sure if this was a tactic, but he whispered into my ear "you like me a lot, I know you do!" I thought, oh yes, yes i do like you. Apparently this salesman got around a lot because out of almost nowhere came his young daughter who obviously knew of her fathers straying ways because she gave him a not so subtle reminder "Dad, why are you right up against that lady's ear?" But he didn't seem to care.
The Salesman told me he also had a son who was a musician, and I assume a backup musician, for the Allman brothers. It seemed out of place that his son would be in a Southern band because the guy was more of a white colar Northeastern kind of GQ guy, but nevertheless, I knew his son wanted him to come out and watch him one day. I felt kindof bad.
Skip ahead and suddenly I was talking to Joyce M. on the phone. I told her that her son, Jimmy, was coincidentally, also in the Allman Brothers band as a backup musician and he needed HIS father to come and see HIM also. So I ended up at a ticket counter with Big John, her ex husband and Jimmy's father. The weird part was I was travelling with my old blue custom van. I got my ticket and John's ticket, they were 50 bucks apeice. I couldn't afford it and had no idea why I was doing this, I somehow felt like a good samaritan. John expressed that he felt more in control if he drove his truck but I told him I felt the same way and we'd have to take my van, especially after the fact that he mentioned that the show was an hours drive. Then I told him i maintained my vehicle well and it would be safer. I looked at the tickets, the seats began with RO, which I thought meant ROOF.
Then I did the math. The tickets, the time. Shoot I had to drive an hour, go to a show that probably didn't get out until 11 pm, then I would have to drive him home and then drive myself home. We hopped into my van. I hoped it worked as I remembered I hadn't used it in over 10 years, and actually I never did maintain it well, that was a lie. I looked at the gas, it was on EMPTY. Suddenly the gas shot up to FULL and the meter turned RED. I realized I was driving from the back seat but seemed to be doing well. I told John, that when we reached a stop light I'd hop into the drivers seat and he could join me in the passenger seat but he seemed to want to sit in the back seat.
I told him we had to make a quick stop. The salesman had left me a message asking me for a date, so I had his phone number, now I could track his address. I had to stop at his house and convince him to go and see the show not having any idea how he'd get tickets near us, but I knew his son would be happy to know he went to the show too. So now I'm at his house, he made a sexual advance and declined going to the show. He said he had no car and I told him well that's why you should go, I have a car and I can bring you. but he still declined. Then his wife who appeared on the couch had a small conversation with me. I wondered if she knew what a snake her husband was.
Then John and I left for the show. The seats were way up high.

The Hellen Sisters

Last night I dreamed I was in downtown crossing looking to find the bingo hall with Amanda and Merri Hellen. It was gloomy and dusk, the street was wet and I pointed two streets away and told the girls that was where we needed to go, where the old Filenes was before they took it down. So we went, with me panicking the whole time saying 'we'll miss the first bingo, we're late!'
So we finally found the place and not only did they not start bingo, not all of the people had arrived and so bingo hadn't started yet. We found a rectangular thick oak wood table to seat 4 and the 4 of us sat down. Actually I sat down, I didn't see anyone else.
I asked Amanda today if any of these things rang a bell and a few moments later she realized she was going to the downtown crossing area, to a show, tonight. It is raining. She also said she was worried she'd be late. I told her not to worry, there will be a late start. I also told her that I forgot my bingo bag and she said Merri almost forgot something. I told her to look out for the oak table that has 4 seats.

The Letters

Tuesday night I dreamed of two separate letters in two separate incidences.
The first dream was highly spiritual, perhaps one of the closest ones I've had with God. I was awoken by a terrible cough and perhaps that is why I remember it so well. I was standing in an isle between the first set of pews and the second. God went by my on my left, or at least a bright ghostly figure that I considered undoubtedly to be Him. He placed a 10 x 6 inch letter on the top of a post at the right corner of the second set of pews. It was glowing with the light of God. It was a letter regarding how one should behave in a relationship.

The second letter was written by Andrew Scrap Livingston, the bassist for Mike Doughty. Scrap was irked and wrote things like 'you did this to me and that to me and treated me so badly'. I assumed he was writing to Mike. The paper was translucent, it was real paper, not computer paper. I didn't see the letters clearlyl in fact they were a blur and the words were made up in my dreamstate imagination.
I told my husband of this dream at 3 am when I was shivering from the fan breeze on a hot summers eve, the fan breeze made me sweat. I told him the dreams again at 5 am when we awoke.
Later in the day I noticed Scrap had written on his blog earlier at 6 am, long after I had the dream. He wrote he was going to play with Mike that evening and also he was going to write a letter to the city about the taxi cabs, he wrote 'two separate incidences!' He wrote back to me that is was weird and strange and awesome!

Later Mike Doughty posted a picture of the parking lot he and Scrap performed in, as a matter of fact Mike spoke quite a bit about the parking lot.
I wonder, yet I'm almost sure, that Mike may have remembered a dream I had many years ago. I walked down a grassy road to see him perform in a parking lot.
Strange place to perform.

The Foreign Boyfriend and the Abundance of Quartz

My husband wasn't too too happy about this dream, but I dreamed I had a burly good-looking foreign boyfriend, whereas I wasn't too upset myself, ha ha. He was tall, broad, handsome; he had black hair, I sensed for some reason he was Greek, maybe Italian. He was on the phone in his livingroom talking to a friend about their country's leader back home. He was angry at some sort of abuse of power or corruption or perhaps something the leader was infiltrating upon his people. A few moments later I was sitting across from him on a couch and I carefully eyed his black biker jacket, but it wasn't the jacket itself that I was staring at, it was the fact that the front of it was covered within every inch with crystal aka quartz pins. One was a long, maybe 3-inch crystal, not a clear one but an opaque one. Clear ones mean purity so this one is unpure but displays it's own beauty. The others were like women's brooches, all types of crystal, all clear and uncolored.
I layed on him with my top off, and then I woke up.